Tag Archives: humor

Internet Dating Escapades XXXVI

This showed up in my personal email inbox the other day…  I have no idea who this guy is, or how he got my email address… because even in my single days, I NEVER had a profile on ChristianMingle.  I even checked… just to make sure I didn’t inadvertently sign up for one one night when I was shitfaced or something (but even when shitfaced I have more sense than that), and I didn’t.

So this was totally weird.  Oh well..

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Internet Dating Escapades Part XXXV

 

It is absolutely 100 percent evident on my Facebook profile that I am in a relationship.

And yet I am messaged almost weekly by people that “like my profile photo.”  They are not bots.  The one last week might have been a terrorist (he was from Pakistan and ridiculously excited when he found out I was American).

I can’t figure out if they choose to ignore the obvious or, like the ones on OKC, only capable of looking at photos and not actually reading (or caring to read) anything about me.

Still, as long as they keep messaging me, I’ll keep fucking with them…

(Click to enlarge photos.)

IDExxxvp1

 

IDExxxvp2

Internet Dating Escapades XXXIII

Double the fun today.

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Internet Dating Escapades XXXII

This guy is 19.  I’m 31.  I think the rest speaks for itself.

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Internet Dating Escapades XXXI

This one was so perplexing I didn’t really know what to say…

First I couldn’t decide whether this person was a man or a woman cause that whole guy vs. femme and “switching to male again” thing was just… I have no idea.

Then I couldn’t decide whether this person (gender TBD) was high or what…

So I wrote it off.

But then it came back.  And again, I am speechless.

Though I do hope it doesn’t go hang itself.  Because it sounds downright depressed and possibly a little suicidal…

But still, those are problems that do not need to be on a dating site.  Regardless…

Too.  Much.  Drama.  If it IS a man, he needs to find his balls somewhere.

 

IDE#11-1  IDE#11-2

 

 

 

Internet Dating Escapades XXX

IDE#10

 

I almost retorted with “I can’t imagine why” when he said no one responds.

But then I decided to let this one speak for itself.

At least he’s easily pleased.

Internet Dating Escapades XXIX

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Seriously, what did he think I was going to say?

Does this ever work?

Internet Dating Escapades XXVIII

IDE#9

Yes, ladies… apparently we are supposed to be impressed when a man figures out how to send heart emoticons through his iPhone.

Clearly my standards are not low enough yet.

Internet Dating Escapades XXVII

IDE#8-1  IDE#8-2  IDE#8-3

 

FYI – my real name is part of my screen name on this site.  And it is very prominently displayed.

Apparently the Florida heat makes one stupid and unobservant.

Actually, this guy was probably already there…

 

(Also, all three files work, despite the fact that WordPress is showing a broken link on my computer.)

Internet Dating Escapades XXVI

IDE#6

I wonder what he’d have done if I’d said yes?